查莉成长日记字幕.pdf

Teddy: Hi, Charlie, It's Teddy here. So right now you're nine months old and everything is going great. Well, almost everything. Now what I'm about to show you is kind of disturbing. So brace yourself. Mom: Mmm, these sandwiches will be yummy wummy. Dad: Yes, they will, yes, they will. Teddy: Mom and dad have been talking like that ever since you arrived andifit's not over soon, I'm gonna go crazy wazy. Gabe: PJ! PJ: What? Gabe: What are you listening to? PJ: I downloaded a podcast on the history of ballet. Gabe: You like that? PJ: More than baby talk. Mom: Would you like some fishy wishies with your cookie wookie? Dad: Yes, I would, yes, I would. Teddy: Wait, guys, Charlie isn't even here. Mom: No, widdle baby take a nappy wappy upstairs. Teddy: So why are you guys still talking like that? Dad: I don't “weawy“ know. Mom: I guess we're just kinda fried. Dad: Well, we work all day, take care of a baby all night. Work shift, baby shift. I've barely got time to make doo-doo. Teddy: Well, when was the last time you guys had a night out? You know, like just the two of you-- like a date? Dad: Teddy made a funny. Mom: A funny wunny. Teddy: Seriously! You know what? It’s Saturday night. You two, you go out, have fun, and do something besides work, take care of the baby and make doo-doo. Mom: Well, it's nice to dream, but who's gonna take of Charlie Teddy: Hello! You’ve got three great babysitters right here. PJ: I'm glad I didn't hear that. Mom: I don't know, Teddy. It's a really nice thought, but we're really not ready to go out without Charlie just yet Gabe: You guys want to see a magic trick? Mom: Sure! Dad: Okay. Gabe: Prepare to be amazed. Mom: I could use a night out.Teddy: All right, you guys have fun. Stay out as late as you want. But not too much fun-- We have enough kids already. Dad: I'm serious.Mom: Okay, everyone, be good, have fun, love you. PJ/Gabe: Yeah yeah. Mom: All right. Dad: Hey, Teddy, thanks for doing this. It's gonna be nice for your mom and I to have some special time together. Mom: Bob, move your butt! Dad: I'm coming! Teddy: All right, so we divide it up evenly, we each get to spend an hour with Charlie. Who wants to go first? Gabe: I think you should go first. PJ: And second and third, since this was your idea. Teddy: Hey, I'm not doing this all by myself. You guys have to help out. PJ: Fine. I'll go fourth. Teddy: There is no fourth. PJ: I meant I shall go forth to the park to shoot some hoop. Teddy: You want to go to the park so badly, then why don't you just take Charlie? PJ: What's a baby supposed to do at the park? Teddy: Babies love parks. You can show her the duck pond, the blue sky, clouds. PJ: We're just gonna look at stuff? That’s what TV is for.PJ: Yeah heh hah, all right! This is great. Whee! Yes, whoo! What are you looking at? I was here first. Hey, you can ride that duck. I couldn't ride the duck. I'd look silly on the duck. Fine. Hey there, Charlie. Are we having fun yet? All right. M: Man, you seen a kid's birthday party around here anywhere? I'm the entertainment. PJ: I saw a bounce house of the other end of the park. M: A bouncy house, eh? Great. Another trip to the E.R. PJ: Who are you supposed to be anyway? Plastic man, rubber man? M: No, those are all registered trademarks. I'm Captain Stretchy. There used to be a “CS“ here, but it came off in the wash. PJ: So what's your super power? M: Super elasticity. Hey, look, there's a quarter. Ah, forget it. Not like it's a dollar, right?PJ: Hi. Emma: Hi. PJ: Oh, yeah, I like your taste in strollers. Emma: Thanks, you too. That baby's so cute. PJ: You too. Oh, I mean yours too. Emma: I'm Emma. PJ: I'm PJ. Who's this little guy? Emma: My brother. We're just out for our stroll. We do this every day. PJ: Us too. Like I always say, babies love parks. Would you like to sit for a bit? Emma: Sure. So I saw you talking to Captain Stretchy earlier.PJ: Oh, yeah, he was lost. Not much of a superhero, right? Emma: Oh, he's the worst. We hired him for my brother's birthday party and he sat on the cake. PJ: That sounds awful. Emma: Oh, it gets worse. The candles was lit, so he sat in the punch PJ: That's so weird. I mean he looks like such a quality entertainer. Emma: You know, PJ, I'm really impressed that you take your baby sister to the park. My brothers would never do anything like that. PJ: I hope not. She is my sister.Gabe: Now watch closely. In this hand I have a quarter and in the other, an ordinary egg. Now I put them in this hat, spin them around a little and presto. Teddy: Just out of curiosity, what was supposed to happen? PJ: I love this baby. Anytime she wants to go to the park, sign me up. Teddy: What happened to you? PJ: Let's just say Charlie made a friend, PJ made a friend. Teddy: Oh-- and did either you or your friend bother to change a dipper? PJ: There's no time for that. I was too busy talking to Emma. Gabe: Who's Emma? PJ: A vision, an angel, the girl who's moved into my heart. Gabe: Did you tell her about the vacanc。