独立写作2正文段落扩展PPT.ppt

托福独立写作正文段落正文段落扩展展今日内容全班：2:00-4:30 p.m. 1）托福独立写作正文段落概述2）列举法段落扩展3）分类法段落扩展4）限时段落写作练习（10 minutes）单独学员：4:35---4:50 p.m. 托福基础写作一补课目标1）了解英语段落的典型结构2）按照某种）按照某种逻辑顺序将主序将主题句句扩展成段落展成段落3）措辞和句法富有亮点）措辞和句法富有亮点段落主题句段落主题句主题句解释主题句解释论证句论证句言简意赅，高言简意赅，高度概括度概括主题句更清晰主题句更清晰而通俗的解释而通俗的解释根据主题句的根据主题句的特点，选择某特点，选择某种逻辑思路进种逻辑思路进行扩展行扩展好段落的特征好段落的特征A typical example:Topic: Advantages of getting a good education(5 minutes of free writing)Finding its merits Getting a good education has many advantages. First, a good education means personal enrichment. A well-educated person is more knowledgeable and civilized. His life is also more meaningful. Second, with a good educational background, one has more opportunities to find a better job. Finally, armed with what education offers, one is likely to make a greater contribution to society and play a role in helping society to advance more rapidly. Logic Map of the Paragraph主题句（段落只统帅）：getting a good education… advantages. 论证句1（统帅帐下大将1）：personal enrichment 论证句2（统帅帐下大将2）：personal enrichment论证句3（统帅帐下大将3）：greater contribution to societyPurpose Topic SentenceSupporting Sentences 一、段落的统一性一个段落应该只说明一个问题，或一个问题的某一一个段落应该只说明一个问题，或一个问题的某一方面；应该只叙述一件事情，方面；应该只叙述一件事情， 或一件事情的某一或一件事情的某一个阶段。

个阶段也就是说，一个段落内的各个句子必须从属于一个也就是说，一个段落内的各个句子必须从属于一个中心，任何游离于中心思想以外的句子都是不可取中心，任何游离于中心思想以外的句子都是不可取的 一一个个好好的的段段落落应该具具有有统一一性性统一一性性就就是是一一个个中中心心思思想想统领整整个个段段落落每每个个细节都都应支支持持主主题句句，，不不应有有无无关关的的细节为了了支支持持主主题，，要要尽尽可可能能多多地地提提供供细节，但又要避免，但又要避免滥用用细节下下图是一个有是一个有统一性的段落的一性的段落的结构构图主主题句句(topic sentence）） _______Supporting Sentence 1 __________ Supporting Sentence 2 ________________ Supporting Sentence 3 _____________________ Supporting Sentence 4例文：例文：Millions of years ago, Australia was linked to Asia by a land bridge. Then an earthquake caused the land bridge to sink. The sea rushed in, and Australia became an island. Later, this island became a British colony. Many animals that once wandered back and forth across the land bridge were left in Australia. And kangaroos were among them. Though they were killed off by large animals in other places, they were about to survive in Australia.这一段讲的是远古时期的澳大利亚，当时连人类都没有，但然这一段讲的是远古时期的澳大利亚，当时连人类都没有，但然不必提它后来沦为英国的殖民地的事了。

此句应删掉不必提它后来沦为英国的殖民地的事了此句应删掉how to write the topic sentenceThree points: (1)a topic sentence must be a complete sentence, rather than a sentence fragment.(2) a topic sentence comes in two parts, topic words (indicating object to be discussed) and expression of thesis (indicating the particular aspect of the thesis). E.g. The Women Movement has had several effects on the English language.(3)a topic sentence can be neither too general nor too specific. how to write the topic sentence Position of the topic sentence: Topic sentence can be put in the beginning.二、段落的完整性一个段落的主题思想靠发展句来实现，如果只有主一个段落的主题思想靠发展句来实现，如果只有主题句而没有发展句来进一步交待和充实，就不能构题句而没有发展句来进一步交待和充实，就不能构成一个完整的段落。

成一个完整的段落     In my English study, I have many difficulties. My first difficulty is that my vocabulary is not large. The second difficulty I have is that I can not write well. The third difficulty is that my listening comprehension is not good enough. Now I have a plan to study English well.主题句：主题句：I have many difficulties. 发展句：具体说明困难发展句：具体说明困难 My first difficulty…; The second difficulty …; The third difficulty ….结尾句：结尾句： Now I have a plan… 篇章结构：分析：本段落看似完整，有头有尾但由于缺少实质内容—即对学英语的困难的原因的分析，文章显得空洞无物；此外，结尾句讲到了plan,具体内容有没有交待，给人留下话好像没说完的感觉。

修改如下：三、段落的连贯性连贯性包括连贯性包括意连意连—内在的逻辑型；和内在的逻辑型；和形连形连—使使用过渡词语、过渡句等方式两者常常不可分用过渡词语、过渡句等方式两者常常不可分割只有形连而没有意连，句子之间没有内在割只有形连而没有意连，句子之间没有内在的有机联系；反之，只有意连而没有形连，有的有机联系；反之，只有意连而没有形连，有时行文就不够流畅时行文就不够流畅如何取得连贯性的建议如何取得连贯性的建议1）使用同一时态）使用同一时态如果随意而毫无理由地改变时态，那么不管作如果随意而毫无理由地改变时态，那么不管作者连句的技巧多么高超，段落也不可能取得连者连句的技巧多么高超，段落也不可能取得连贯性在写作时，可以使用现在时或过去时在写作时，可以使用现在时或过去时选用哪一种取决于作者处理材料的方式选用哪一种取决于作者处理材料的方式2)使用某种逻辑顺序使用某种逻辑顺序常用的逻辑顺序有：常用的逻辑顺序有： 1）时间顺序）时间顺序2）空间顺序）空间顺序3）重要性顺序）重要性顺序4）熟悉度顺序）熟悉度顺序3) 使用连接成分使用连接成分使用某些连接词和短语，重复某些关键词，可使用某些连接词和短语，重复某些关键词，可以大大增加段落的连贯性。

某些以大大增加段落的连贯性某些连接词连接词、、短语短语和和关键词关键词可以起粘着物的作用，把各部分连接可以起粘着物的作用，把各部分连接起来，使句子间的关系更加清楚起来，使句子间的关系更加清楚连接成分主要有以下三种：连接成分主要有以下三种：a．连接词语b．代词: 代词用于提醒读者注意其先行词，以此把有关的部分连接起来c．重复关键词语示范段落示范段落① Until recently daydreaming was viewed as a waste of time．② Or it was considered an unhealthy escape from real life and its duties．③ But now some people are taking a fresh look at daydreaming．④ And it may be that more people are suffering from a lack of daydreaming than are suffering from too much of it．连接词连接词连接词连接词段落扩展通用模式四步法四步法第一步：段落主题句/论据（言简意赅）第二步：主题句扩展解释（成熟严密）第三步：逻辑扩展（如举例）（泛/精：理论，数据，常识，名人经历、个人轶事）第四步：总结（来自举例，呼应首句）举例1Topic: Nowadays, people put too much emphasis on personal appearance and fashion. Theme: Disagree (it has benefits)   [1] To begin with, having good appearance can be valuable to an individual when he is looking for a job. [2] Many times, the way that a person looks and dresses can help him get hired. After all, an interviewer’s first impression is often based upon a person’s looks. So, if an individual ignores his appearance and fashion, he might not be successful during the interview process. [3] My older brother had an experience just like this. A few months after he got his current job, his boss told my brother that he had been competing against a women for the job. However, because my brother looked more professional, his boss decided to hire him, so my brother got the job. [4] Taking special care of one’s appearance can certainly help one’s career.  [1] Next, if a person emphasizes his appearance, he can improve his self-esteem. [2] Many people suffer from low esteem and a lack of self-confidence. However, people who have good bodies and wear fashionable clothes often feel better about themselves. Their appearance actually gives them more confidence. [3] Again, my older brother is an excellent example. He was always overweight and very shy in middle school. He also had few friends and was not very popular. However, he started paying more attention to his shell and almost immediately became a more confident, outgoing person. This change made him more popular at school too, so he started feeling better about himself. [4] It seems clear to me that people are happier when they take care of their appearance and are confident in how they work. 举例2Topic: It is better to take a trip by oneself than to take a group tour with guidance. Theme: Taking a group tour     [1] First, group tours plan travelers’ entire itineraries. [2] Because their trip has already been arranged, people do not have to worry about where they are going or how they are getting there. They can simply relax, enjoy their trip, and not get stressed out about anything. [3] For example, my family once took a package tour to China. The travel agency arranged everything. It took care of the hotel reservations, transportation, and sightseeing. My family did not have to worry about anything. We just looked at the schedule the travel agency had provided and followed it. thanks to the travel agency, we could just relax and enjoy our entire trip. This made things easier on my father since he did not have to worry every single minute about where we would go next. All in all, we had a great trip. [4] Group tours take the anxiety of daily planning out of traveling and let travelers enjoy their vacations without any stress. Time to have a tryTopic 1: It is better to take the most difficult and challenging classes in university or at college even if means that you probably will not get top grades in them. Theme: challenging…Outlining 1)Learn more and develop better study skills 2)Achieve more as a students and individual  [1] First of all, I can learn more and develop better study skills if I take difficult and challenging classes. [2] In those classes, the professors will be much more demanding and expect the best from their students. [3] For example, I once took a math class with a teacher who was infamous for being really tough. She definitely lived up to her reputation. I had loads of homework every night, and the class was a struggle at times. However, I got used to the heavy course load, and, while tough, the teacher was fair, and I learned more in that math class than in any other one I had ever taken. [4] Taking challenging courses is definitely a good way to learn more.  [1] Moreover, by setting higher goals for myself, I can achieve more as a student and individual than I would if I set low goals or none at all. [2] Competing tough courses regardless of my final grades will increase my confidence and experience. [3] Last year, I enrolled in a French language course for the first time. I was nervous at first, and the course was demanding. But, in time, I developed a lot of confidence in this class. This year, I am continuing with French, and it is becoming much easier for me because of my experience. To me, it is the experience and confidence that counts, not getting a perfect grade. [4] Taking harder courses will clearly outweigh the easy ones. Have another try Topic: A teacher’s ability to relate well with his or her students is more important than the ability to give them knowledge. Theme: Agree, relate well with students  [1] These days, teachers have to know not only how to get their students’ attention but also how to keep a hold of it in order to teach them. [2] The world has changed very much in the past decade, and students these days are not interested in the same things they were ten or twenty years ago. [3] For example, we live in an age dominated by electronics, particularly computers. Most students my age know how to use all of the latest gadgets. Unfortunately, many teachers are technologically inept, so they have difficulty relating to students that way. Most of them never incorporate technology into their classes. Instead, they just lecture, which makes their classes boring. Some of them, however, use computers for things like PowerPoint presentations, which really helps to get most students’ attention. [4] Teachers that can relate to their students in areas like technology are definitely more able to keep their students’ attention. Practice for consolidation Topic: It is more important to use land for human needs such as farming, housing, and industry than to save it for endangered animals. Theme: save land for humans    [1] To begin with, humans need to use all of the land they can gain access to. [2] As the planet’s population continues to grow, people need to move onto land that was previously occupied only by animals. [3] In many countries, there are large numbers of cities with over a million people. In fact, some cities, like Tokyo, Seoul, and New York, have populations of over ten million. These cities are overcrowded, so many people need to move out of them and onto new lands. While they may be moving to lands that are inhabited by endangered animals, the welfare of humans is much more important than that of a few endangered animals. [4] People have to take care of Earth’s expanding population, and the best way to enable people to live more comfortably is to move onto lands inhabited by animals. 逻辑扩展方法1）罗列发2）分类法3）定义法4）举例法5）因果法I.罗列法列法Listing：：￿￿￿￿￿￿￿￿￿￿The importance of taking outdoor exercises cannot be overemphasized. To begin with,…  In addition,…    Finally, …     Example:       This book will have a major impact on both politics and economics in China. In politics,…   In economics,…     Example: Reading extensively is obviously of great benefit in learning a new language. For one thing, …For another, …逻辑词连接接第一（首先）：第一（首先）：First and foremost, To begin with, to start with, in the first place,For one thing,  第二（其次）：第二（其次）：in addition, furthermore, moreover, what is more, 第三（最后）：第三（最后）：Last but not least, more importantly逻辑连接接词必必须一起出一起出现的短的短语：：In the first place, In the second place, In the third place,For one thing, For another, 逻辑连接接词但是（但是（转折）：折）：otherwise, nevertheless, 同同时：：meanwhile=in the meantime 因此：因此：as a result, accordingly,consequently, therefore, 逻辑连接接词总之：之：￿￿￿￿￿￿to sum up, all in all, generally speaking, in general结论:     to conclude, in conclusion,     in short,  Practice Topic: Staying up late causes trouble (3 points; 80 words)Have a try Advantages/drawbacks of online-shopping II.分分类法法Classification表示分表示分类的常用的常用词语动词：：￿ ￿be divided into, be classified into, be grouped into, fall into                             名名词：：￿ ￿kind, sort, category, group, class, type 分分类法的段落主法的段落主题句：句：e.g. 总体来体来说，根据地理位置的不同，酒店可以分，根据地理位置的不同，酒店可以分为四大四大类。

总的来的来说：：Generally speaking 不同的地理位置：不同的地理位置：different locations 酒店：酒店：hotel总体来体来说，根据地理位置的不同，酒店可以分，根据地理位置的不同，酒店可以分为四大四大类Generally speaking, hotels can be  classified into 4 groups based on their different locations. e.g. 中国父母中国父母对独生子女的独生子女的态度不同，可以分度不同，可以分为三三类￿ ￿独生子女：独生子女：only child in the family 不同不同态度：度：different attitudes Dictator, democracy, spoiling 2、中国父母、中国父母对独生子女的独生子女的态度不同，可以分度不同，可以分为三三类￿ ￿In China, parents can be divided into  3 categories in light of their different attitudes on the only child in the family. Practice Topic: Classification of college students Knowledge-oriented Ability-oriented Fun-oriented Have a try Classification of friends III.定定义法法￿ ￿Definition正式定正式定义：：￿￿￿￿￿￿￿￿￿￿￿￿￿￿￿￿￿￿￿￿￿￿￿￿￿￿￿￿￿￿form of …  is a   species of    …which/who …                kind ofe.g. 1、牙医是、牙医是经过专业训练去去护理人理人类牙牙齿的医生。

的医生￿ ￿牙医：牙医：dentist护理：理：treat经过专业训练：：be professionally trained 牙医是牙医是经过专业训练去去护理人理人类牙牙齿的医生￿ ￿A dentist is a kind of doctor who is professionally trained to treat people’s teeth. 铜是一种容易成形的是一种容易成形的软性性￿￿￿￿￿￿￿￿￿￿￿￿￿￿￿￿金属￿￿￿￿￿￿铜：：copper金属：金属：metal 铜是一种容易成形的是一种容易成形的软性金性金￿ ￿属Copper is a sort of soft metal which is easily shaped. 学学术定定义：：￿ ￿…is a kind of science which ………是一种是一种…的科学地理学可以定地理学可以定义为研究地球表面的科学研究地球表面的科学地理学：地理学：geography 研究：研究：study地球表面：地球表面：the surface of the earth     地理学可以定地理学可以定义为研究地球表面的研究地球表面的科学。

科学Geography is a kind of science  which studies the surface of the earth. 语言学可以定言学可以定义为研究人研究人类语言的科学言的科学语言学：言学：linguistics人人类的的语言：言：the language of human race    语言学可以定言学可以定义为研究人研究人类语言的科学言的科学￿￿￿￿￿￿￿￿￿￿￿￿Linguistics is a  kind of science which studies the language of human race. 注意定义之后，往往要和其他论证方法相结合，如举例，如列举等Practice Topic: What is success?Career, family, morality IV. 举例法例法Examples 例例证的常用表达：的常用表达：As an illustration, A case in point is that…To take … as an example, …To consider…as an example, …例例证的常用表达：的常用表达：For example,For instance, As the present situation shows in our country, …数据或事例支持数据或事例支持1）表示）表示““科学研究表明科学研究表明””According to a research, …(Scientific) research shows/indicates/suggests数据或事例支持数据或事例支持2) 表示表示““科学家科学家认为””According to scientists on 某学科某学科,… Scientists on 某学科某学科￿ ￿believe that…地理学：地理学：Geography  化学：化学：Chemistry 数学：数学：Mathematics   医学：医学：Medicine 生物学：生物学：Biology        物理学：物理学：Physics建筑学：建筑学：Architecture航空学：航空学：Aeronautics文学：文学：Literature 教育：教育：Education；；Pedagogics法学：法学：Law经济：：Economics 政治：政治：Politics 宗教：宗教：Religion 音音乐：：Music 传媒：媒：Mass Media 旅游：旅游：Tourism 哲学：哲学：Philosophy数据或事例支持数据或事例支持3）表示）表示““数据表明数据表明””According to statisticsStatistics show/indicate/suggest thatStatistics show that the tropical rain forests（（热带雨林）雨林）of Amazon River were cut down at a rate of 14 million hectares(公公顷) each year.数据或事例支持数据或事例支持4）表示）表示““调查表明表明””   Surveys (A recent survey) show  (indicate, suggest) that…数据或事例支持数据或事例支持5)引引导事事实It is a well-known fact that…It is (widely) believed that…It is a widely-held belief that…It is true that…There is no denying that…e.g.不可否不可否认的是，互的是，互联网是人网是人类历史上的史上的一一项伟大大发明。

明e.g.There is no denying that Internet is a great invention in mankind’s history.数据或事例支持数据或事例支持6）表示）表示““比如比如/例如例如””like, such as, for example, saye.g.   很多来自于中国的年很多来自于中国的年轻运运动员，比如，比如刘翔，在奥运会上享有很高的声誉刘翔，在奥运会上享有很高的声誉Tips: 比如刘翔比如刘翔: say Liu Xiange.g.   很多来自于中国的年很多来自于中国的年轻运运动员，比如刘翔，，比如刘翔，在奥运会上享有很高的声誉在奥运会上享有很高的声誉￿￿￿￿￿￿Many young athletes from China, say Liu Xiang, enjoy a high reputation in the Olympic Games. e.g.    用用such as 造句造句我我们都羡慕甚至嫉妒那些取得巨大成就的人，都羡慕甚至嫉妒那些取得巨大成就的人，比如成比如成龙和李和李连杰那些明星杰那些明星Tips:羡慕：羡慕：admire      嫉妒：嫉妒：envy取得巨大成就：取得巨大成就：attain great achievements成成龙：：Jacky Chen, 李李连杰：杰：Jet Li.￿￿￿￿We all admire even envy those who have attained great achievements, such as Jacky Chen, Jet Li.￿￿￿￿￿￿We all admire even envy those who have attained great achievements, such those famous stars as Jacky Chen, Jet Li.举某物某物为例例Take something for example某物是好例子某物是好例子Something is a perfect example.Something is an illustrating example.举例思例思维练习：：1、常做家、常做家务的一个好的一个好处￿￿￿￿￿￿￿￿￿￿￿￿￿￿￿￿￿￿￿￿￿￿￿￿￿￿￿￿￿￿￿￿￿￿￿￿￿￿￿￿￿￿￿￿￿￿举例例2、好朋友、好朋友对我影响最大我影响最大￿￿￿￿￿￿￿￿￿￿￿￿￿￿￿￿￿￿￿￿￿￿￿￿￿￿￿￿￿￿￿￿￿￿￿￿￿￿￿￿￿￿￿￿￿￿举例例3、成功的一、成功的一项品品质￿￿￿￿￿￿￿￿￿￿￿￿￿￿￿￿￿￿￿￿￿￿￿￿￿￿￿￿￿￿￿￿￿￿￿￿￿￿￿￿￿￿￿￿￿￿￿￿￿￿￿￿￿￿￿￿￿￿￿￿￿￿举例例4、我喜、我喜欢动画片的一个原因画片的一个原因￿￿￿￿￿￿￿￿￿￿￿￿￿￿￿￿￿￿￿￿￿￿￿￿￿￿￿￿￿￿￿￿举例例5、我想回到儿童、我想回到儿童时代的一个原因代的一个原因￿￿￿￿￿￿￿￿￿￿￿￿￿￿￿￿举例例Cause and Effect 因果法因果法Example Topic:Science can do good to mankind, but it can do evil as well.段落扩展 Science can do good to mankind, but it can do evil as well. sciencedo gooddo evilS-1G-1G-2G-nE-1E-2E-n段落扩展 (1)Science can do good to mankind, but it can do evil as well. (2)When it is wisely used, it will bring benefit. (3)For example, atomic energy can help us generate electricity. (4)However, if it is wrongly used, its destructive power will be uncontrollable and terrible. (5)It can claim thousands and thousands of lives in a split second. 段落扩展主题句一级扩展一级扩展一级扩展二级扩展二级扩展二级扩展二级扩展二级扩展二级扩展衔接过渡衔接过渡 (1)Science can do good to mankind, but it can do evil as well. (2)When it is wisely used, it will bring benefit. (3)For example, atomic energy can help us generate electricity. (4)However, if it is wrongly used, its destructive power will be uncontrollable and terrible. (5)It can claim thousands and thousands of lives in a split second. science does good, does evil bring benefit destructive power … atomic energy claim lives … … … … 衔接过渡衔接过渡衔接过渡衔接过渡衔接过渡衔接过渡衔接过渡衔接过渡因果法（Cause and Effect）￿￿￿因果法经常用以阐述原因，回答“为什么”这类问题，分析事物发展的前因后果，也多见于说明文和论述文。

因果关系的普遍性决定了因果关系的复杂性，通常因果关系模式有一因一果、一一因一果、一因多果、一果多因和多果多因因多果、一果多因和多果多因等，而以因果方式扩展段落时通常可采用先因后果或先果后因的一因多果或一果多因模式，其中的多因或多果用通常以枚举方式列举例：      Four patterns of cause-effect relationshipSingle-cause-single-effect patternSingle-cause-many-effects patternMany-causes-single-effect patternCausal chain pattern                     Effect oneCause          Effect two                     Effect threeTree diagram of single-cause-many effectsOutline 1: (side-by-side pattern)1. The cause: I went back to college after ten years of being a housewife.2. Negative effects: a. My husband feels worried; b. My children have less care from their mother than before; c. I do not have enough time to take care of the family.3. Positive effects: a. My husband is learning to look after his children; b. My children are learning to be more independent; c. I am learning a lot and becoming more intelligent.Outline 2: (point-by-point method)1.The cause: I went back to college after ten years of being a housewife.2. The effects on my husband: My husband feels worried, but he is learning to look after his children.3. The effects on my children Though my children have less care from their mother than before, they are learning to be more independent.4. The effects on myself I do not have enough time to take care of the family. However, I am learning a lot and becoming more intelligent.                     Cause oneEffect           Cause two                     Cause threeTree diagram of many-causes-single-effectEffect: Smoking cigarettes can be an expensive habit.Causes: 1) The cost of cigarettes is high. 2) The hidden cost of clean-up of clothing stuffs, furniture and carpet is high.Tree diagram of causal chain: ( cause 1)  ( effect 1) = ( cause 2 )  (effect 2) = (cause 3)   effect 3 Examples:This surge of demand for oil will soon begin to send shock waves through America’s economy and transportation system.There are many reasons why languages change, but three major causes help illustrate the concept.(Thirty-six per cent of the freshmen entering a large New York university are dismissed during or at the end of the first year.) Studies indicate that this alarming rate of failure is due to a variety of causes, some of which are beyond the control of the student. (1) There are three reasons why some students can not finish their college studies. (2) Some students fail in college because their academic background is weak. (3)For example, one student might not have had an adequate mathematics course in high school, so he fails his university mathematics class. (4)Next, because of financial problems, other students may fail university classes. (5)According to an article in China Daily, about 9% of the students who have to take jobs don't have as much time to study, as a result of which, they may fail their classes. (6)Finally, some students are not interested in college so they spend their time doing other things. (7)Consequently, they fail. (8)Because of the weak academic background, financial problems and loss of interest in study, numerous students fail in college every year.1￿动词：￿引述原因的有：to￿result￿from;￿to￿be the￿result￿of;￿to￿be￿due￿to;￿to￿be￿a consequence￿of…引述结果的有：to￿lead￿to;￿to￿contribute￿to;￿to￿result￿in;￿to￿be￿the￿cause￿of,￿cause…2￿常用有介词和介词短语有：because￿of,￿owing￿to,￿on￿account￿of.3￿常用来表示原因的连词有：because,￿as,￿since, for,￿in￿that,￿now￿that,￿seeing￿that,￿considering￿that,4￿常用来表示结果的语言素材有：so￿that,￿so…that, such…that,therefore,￿as￿a￿result,￿consequently,￿accordingly,￿thus￿等。

Writing Task 1the popularity of online shoppingThe paragraph is about 100 words.You can focus on either causes or effects.。