生活大爆炸剧本第二季第五集.doc

THE BIG BANG THEORYbyChuck Lorre & Bill PradySeason 2, Episode 5 (s02e05) Title: The Euclid Alternative---> Dialog only <---Sheldon: Good morning, Leonard.Leonard: Uh-huh.Sheldon: Yeah, we're gonna have to stop by Pottery Barn on the way to work. I bought these “Star Wars” sheets. But they turned out to be much too stimulating to be compatible with a good night's sleep. I don't like the way Darth Vader stares at me.Leonard: I'm not going to work.Sheldon: Oh, just because your career's been stagnant for a few years, that's no reason to give up.Leonard: Sheldon, I was up all night using the new free-electron laser for my x-ray-diffraction experiment.Sheldon: Did the laser accidentally burn out your retinas?Leonard: No.Sheldon: Then you can drive. Let's go.Leonard: Didn't I tell you I'd be working nights and that you'd have to make other arrangements?Sheldon: You did.Leonard: And?Sheldon: I didn't. Let's go.Leonard: Good night, Sheldon.Sheldon: But how am I going to get to work?Leonard: Take the bus.Sheldon: But I can't take the bus anymore. They don't have seat belts. And they won't let you lash yourself to the seat with bungee cords.Leonard: You tried to lash yourself to the seat with bungee cords?Sheldon: I didn't try, I succeeded. But for some reason, it alarmed the other passengers and I was asked to de-bus.Leonard: Oh, you're a big boy. You'll figure it out.Sheldon: Don't talk to me like I'm a child. Now take me to return my “Star Wars” sheets. Sheldon: Penny? Penny? penny?Penny: Sheldon, what is it?Sheldon: Leonard's asleep.Penny: Thanks for the update.Sheldon: No, wait. You have to drive me to work.Penny: Yeah, I really don't think I do.Sheldon: But I don't drive and I can't take the bus.Penny: Honey, you'll be fine as long as you don't do that bungee cord thing, okay?Sheldon: Penny. Didn't you recently stated that you and I are friends?Penny: Yes, Sheldon, we are friends.Sheldon: Then I hereby invoke what I'm given to understand is an integral part of the implied covenant of friendship…… The favor.Penny: Oh, dear God.Sheldon: I'm sorry, I didn't realize I was interrupting your morning prayers. When you're done, we'll go.============================================ THEME SONG ===========================================Sheldon: Thank you for driving me to work.Penny: You know this is my day off, Sheldon.Sheldon: Oh, good, I'm not keeping you from anything. Your check-engine light is on.Penny: Mm-hm.Sheldon: Typically that's an indicator to, you know, check your engine.Penny: It's fine. It's been on for, like, a month.Sheldon: Well, actually, that would be all the more reason to, you know, check your engine.Penny: Sheldon, it's fine.Sheldon: If it were fine, the light wouldn't be on. That's why the manufacturer installed that light, to let you know it's not fine.Penny: Maybe the light's broken.Sheldon: Is there a check-the-check-engine-light light? Oh.Penny: What?Sheldon: Studies have shown that performing tasks such as eating, talking on a cell phone or drinking coffee while driving reduces one's reaction time by the same factor as an ounce of alcohol.Penny: Do you have any alcohol?Sheldon: Of course not.Penny: Too bad.Sheldon: You're going up Euclid Avenue?Penny: Mm-hm.Sheldon: Leonard takes Los Robles Avenue.Penny: Well, good for Leonard.Sheldon: Euclid Avenue is shorter as the crow flies, but it has speed bumps, which appreciably increase point-to-point drive time, making it the less efficient choice. But you have the con. Of course, if you're not going to slow down for the speed bumps, I withdraw my previous objection. Here's a fun question. Do you know what the most common street name is?Penny: No.Sheldon: The answer's tricky. It's Second Street. You see, you'd think it would be First Street. But in most towns, First Street eventually gets renamed to something else. You know, like Main Street, Broad Street, Michigan Avenue. Leonard and I often use our commute time to exercise our minds with brain teasers like that. We also play games. Would you like to play one?Penny: No.Sheldon: Oh, come on, it's fun. Whoo! Another bump. Okay. Uh, I'll say an element and, uh, you say an element whose name starts with the last letter of the one I said, okay? I'll start. Helium. Now, you could say, “Mercury”. That would give me a Y. Ooh, very clever. That's a tough one. So I go with ytterbium, which gets you back to M. So you go “Molybdenum”. And I say magnesium. And you say, „Manganese.“ And I say europium. And, then, you're left with „Mendelevium.“ And there are no more M's, because I believe that meitnerium should still be called eka-iridium. So congratulations, you win. Do you wanna go again?Penny: How about we just have a little quiet time now?Sheldon: All right. I'm sorry. I'm finding your reckless nonchalance regarding the check-engine light to be very 。