TED演讲-一名陪审员对死刑的思考LindyLouIsonhood(中英文参考学习)43

【演讲者及介绍】Lindy Lou Isonhood1994年，林迪·卢·伊索胡德(Lindy LouIsonhood)在一起谋杀案的审判中担任陪审员2号，这段经历改变了她的一生【演讲主题】陪审员对死刑的思考翻译者 Nancy Cai 校对者 Max Liu00:13It was a Thursday, June the 23rd, 1994. 那是1994 年，6 月 23 日，一个周四。00:23(Sighs) （叹息）00:24"Collect your belongings. You are freeto go. When escorted outside, go directly to your car. Do not talk toreporters." “收拾好你的东西，你可以离开了。被护送出去之后，直接上车，不要和记者说话。”00:36My head is spinning, my heart is racing, Ican't get a breath. I just want out of there. When I get to my car, I throweverything on the back, and I just collapse into the driver's seat. "Ican't do this. I can't go home to my family that I haven't seen in a week andpretend to be happy." Not even their love and support could help me atthis particular time. 我的头有点眩晕，我的心跳很快，我快要不能呼吸了，我只想离开那里。上车后，我把所有东西都扔到后座，直接瘫倒在驾驶座上。“我不能这么做，我有一周没见到我的家人了，我不能回家对他们强颜欢笑。”即使是他们的爱和支持，此时此刻也不能帮我解脱。01:19We had just sentenced a man to death. Nowwhat? Just go home and wash dishes? 我们刚刚对一个人判了死刑，现在呢？回家继续若无其事地生活吗？01:32You see, in Mississippi, the death penaltyis like a part of our unspoken culture. The basic logic is, if you murdersomeone, then you're going to receive the death penalty. So when the juryselection process took place, they asked me, "Could you, if the evidencepresented justified the death penalty, could you deliver, rationally andwithout reservations, a penalty of death?" My answer was an astounding"yes," and I was selected as Juror Number 2. 要知道，在密西西比，死刑就像是我们的文化中不能谈论的一部分。基本逻辑就是，如果你谋杀了别人，那你就要被处以死刑。于是，在选择陪审团的过程中，他们问我，“当呈现的证据支持死刑时，你能够理性地、没有疑虑地支持死刑吗？”我斩钉截铁地回答，“是的”，于是我被选作 2 号陪审员。02:26The trial started. From the evidence beingpresented and from the pictures of the victim, my first response was, "Yes,this man is a monster, and he deserves the death penalty." For days, I satand looked at his hands, the ones that yielded the knife, and against his pastywhite skin, his eyes . Well, he spent endless days in his cell, no sunlight,so his eyes were as black as his hair and his mustache. He was veryintimidating, and there was absolutely no doubt in his guilt. 审判开始了，从呈现的证据中，还有被害者的照片中，我的第一反应就是，“是的，这个人是个怪物，他理应被判处死刑。”在很多天里，我曾经坐在那儿看着他的双手，就是那双持刀的手。在他苍白的皮肤的映衬下，他的眼睛他在牢房里呆了无数天，没有阳光，所以他的眼睛就像他的头发和胡子那么黑。他很吓人，他的罪行也毋庸置疑。03:21But regardless of his guilt, as the dayspassed, I began to see this monster as a human being. Something inside of mewas changing that I just didn't understand. I was beginning to question myselfas to whether or not I wanted to give this man the death penalty. 但是无论他是否有罪，随着日子一天天过去，我开始把他当作一个人来看待，而不再是一个怪物。我内心发生了一些我自己都不理解的变化。我开始问我自己，我到底想不想对这个人判处死刑。03:47Jury deliberations began, and the judgegave us jury instructions and it was to be used as a tool in how to reach averdict. Well, using this tool only led to one decision, and that was the deathpenalty. I felt backed into a corner. My head and my heart were in conflictwith each other, and the thought of the death penalty made me sick. However,following the judge's instructions, being a law-abiding person, I gave up. Igave up and voted along with the other 11 jurors. And there it was: our brokenjudicial system at work. 陪审团审议开始了，法官给了我们陪审团指南，它是一个工具，用来帮我们达成判决。于是，根据它，我们只做了一个判决，就是死刑。我感觉自己被困在了一个角落里，我的思想和内心在打架，一想到死刑我就觉得反感。但是，我是个遵纪守法的人，我遵循了法官的指示，我放弃了自己的立场。我和其他的 11 个陪审员投了一样的票，这就是，我们破碎的司法系统的真实场景。04:50So here I am in my car, and I'm wondering:How is my life ever going to be the same? My life was kids, work, church, ballgames - just your average, normal, everyday life. Now everything felt trivial.I was going down this rabbit hole. The anger, the anxiety, the guilt, thedepression . it just clung to me. I knew that my life had to resume, so Isought counseling. The counselor diagnosed me with PTSD and told me that thebest way to overcome the PTSD was to talk about the trauma. However, if Italked or tried to talk about the trauma outside her office, I was shut down.No one wanted to hear about it. He was just a murderer. Get over it. It wasthen that I decided to become a silent survivor. 于是我坐在车里，痛苦地想，我的生活还怎么能再像以前一样？曾经我的生活就是围绕着孩子，工作，教堂，球赛就是再普通不过的日常生活。现在所有事都变得微不足道了。我掉进了一个兔子洞，我感到愤怒，焦虑，愧疚，抑郁它紧紧地抓着我。我知道我必须让我的生活重新步入正轨，所以我寻求了心理咨询。心理咨询师将我诊断为 PTSD （创伤后应激障碍），并告诉我，克服 PTSD 最好的办法就是与人讨论那次创伤。但是，出了她的办公室，一旦我试图谈论那次创伤，我就会被制止。没人愿意听，他就是个杀人犯，忘了这件事吧。于是从那时起，我决定做一个沉默的幸存者。06:06Twelve years later, 2006, I learned thatBobby Wilcher had dropped all of his appeals, and his execution date wasapproaching. That was like a punch in the stomach. All of those buried feelingsjust started coming back. To try and find peace, I called Bobby's attorney, andI said, "Can I see Bobby before he's executed?" 12 年后的 2006 年，我了解到 BobbyWilcher 放弃了所有的上诉，他的处决日期已经临近了。这就像是当头一棒，所有那些被压抑下去的感觉一下子又回来了，为了寻求内心的平和，我给 Bobby 的律师打了电话，说“在处决之前，我能见 Bobby 一面吗？” 06:36Driving to the penitentiary on the day ofhis execution, in my mind, Bobby was going to be manic. But, surprisingly, hewas very calm. And for two hours, he and I sat there and talked about life, andI got to ask him to forgive me for my hand in his death.