【英文读物】Good Form and Christian Etiquette

【英文读物】Good Form and Christian EtiquettePreface. Let no one who shall do me the honor to read this little book suppose that I have been “laying down a lot of rules.” The most that I have attempted is to point out some of those regulations which the experiences of thoughtful men and women of the world have found necessary to good social order, as well as some of those things that a long experience in work for the unfortunate has discovered as requisite to the prevention of scandals and consequent ostracism. To have seen conscientious young men and women struggling against the awful current of popular reproach because of certain things in conduct which, while innocent to them, have inevitably aroused suspicion in a suspicious world, is to at least wish to help those who have asked help, or who are willing to receive it, to the end that they may iv acquire that sort of knowledge which shall enable them to avoid such peril and contempt. The questions which appear in these pages are bona fide questions, written and sent to me by those who asked them for themselves or others. The positions taken are all based on what I believe to be principles which must lie at the foundation of any social life that would keep itself unspotted from the world, and which can be used as a testimony to the gospel in the sight of a wicked and untoward generation. I have not written for the world. Many writers have done that. Nor have I written for the nominal Christian; but for those who are earnestly looking for the best means of serving God and humanity, while they are also looking for that blessed hope,the glorious appearing of our Lord. S. M. I. Henry.Good Form. chapter 1 I. “Good form” is especially a society phrase, but it is full of meaning, such as has a direct bearing on even the life and walk of a missionary. It is of sufficient importance to engage the attention of any who would become cultured, and is practical and simple enough to become a subject of study in the most common, isolated home, in which children are growing up. It is in good and bad form that is found a large share of all that difference which distinguishes the lady or gentleman from the slattern and the boor; and in the consideration given to this question of manners it is once again true that “the children of this world are wiser than the children of light.” Luke 16:8. 4One of the first efforts that men or women will make if they have an “ax to grind,” or “something to borrow,” will be to appear well. If they have anything “to push,” an advantage to secure, which makes it necessary that some influential people shall be “won over” to some certain way of thinking, they will study every movement, turn, and word; learn tact, self-control, or anything else by which they can hope to succeed. Many a man has practised facial expression for hours before a mirror, not for amusement, but for business; to the end that he might tone down or eradicate certain lines which would make an unfavorable impression upon those whom he met, and has carefully cultivated in their place those that would be sure to give him a better introduction among those whom he intended to use to his own profit or pleasure. This is constantly done in the interests of self, and has often resulted in forwarding those mercenary 5 and sometimes criminal ends for which it was designed. For the same purpose men learn grace of carriage,how to enter and leave a room, how to moderate every tone; and practise laboriously in private, to fix as habit anything which they believe to be desirable, and eradicate anything that would be a hindrance, so that they may never be taken off guard by any rush of feeling, and so jeopardize the selfish interests which are at stake. For the same end little children are put into training of the most exacting sort, and grow up almost perfect copies of some great master in certain forms which, while in themselves empty, yet are like buckets, capable of holding anything. And until Christians are willing to labor as faithfully to become winsome themselves, and train their children to do the best of all work in the best of all forms, they have not yet come to love the truth as the world loves self. 6The truth is to be carried to all people, high and low. A boor, who loves the truth, and who is filled with the Holy Spirit, may do a good work in some lines. If he has had no opportunities to know how to carry himself among men, except such knowledge as comes by being a Christian, God will keep him where he can be used, and will use him to his glory, and give him sheaves to bring home at last. “Be a Christian” is an easy answer to the question, “How shall I conduct myself in such and such a case?” But a man may be a Christian, and yet, for the lack of some specific instruction in certain forms of procedure, perpetrate a blunder which will bring the laugh from the profane whom he wished to arouse to sober thought; or ma